Reith's Horoscope

Capricorn
you will eat some corn and wear some sort of caprices. Also, your family is planning on killing unless you enlighten them eith your unlimted wisdom.

Aquarius
If you are selling your house, you will change your mind and possibly decide to eat it. the position of venus says that you should show other people your true colours to make them like you.

Aries
Say goodbye to your television, Kevin is eating it as you read this. Also avoid connections with unpositive Sagittariuses, they may be planting a gun.

Leo
Change your name, the FBI may be hunting you after that murder your horoscope told you to commit 3 months ago.

Taurus
You will win the lottery and become king of the world because you are so awesome.

Pisces
You will make a big commitment that may involve the big ones. However, some people may appear negative about your new commitment, let me assure you-it's just jeasosy.

Virgo
LOL-VIRGIN