The Coach

"Get away from my boys!!!"

- The Coach

The Coach is an obese character that hallucinates that he has a sport's team that plays marbles. In Sports Na Na Na!], Stam is just walking and The Coach confronts him claiming that he is on his boys's field. In the end Stam wins. In Stam Reith Smackdown he is easily beaten by Stam. In Today I Am A God we see one of his boys hallucinations for the first time. In The Stam Reith Musical, it is revealed that his boys play marbles. In The Thing, Nevada has The Coaches boys taken hostage, but in the end they are saved. In Alternate Timeline, he is slightly less insane. In Through The Coaches Eyes, Stam learns that The Coach has been hanging around to train everyone for the olympics of 200 BC. The Coach is replaced with a tomato. His boys start to fade and he becomes an alcoholic. At Vogler's bachelor party, they return and continuity errors give him his job back. In Pandemic, when Vogler is locked out of the studio, The Coach says that his boys have shotguns and he refuses to let him in. He was one of the four in I Know What Vogler Did Last Summer who killed The Stalker with the terminal cancer. It is revealed that he can read and Vogler killed him because he is a nerd. In Stam Reith Disbands (part one), it is revealed that he has a medical licence. Coach believes jacob is an evil demon. He is also the half-brother of Coach Tanaka.